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support circle
self-care
whilst supporting an individual who has been subjected to sexual violence & abuse can be rewarding, it can also be an overwhelming experience. there may be times when you are frustrated because you don't feel like you can help. there many be instances where you feel triggered because of something we have shared with you. this is all part of being human. it is important to look after yourselves throughout this process. even though we are going through a difficult time, your physical & mental wellbeing should remain a priority. meeting your own wants and needs does not always come easy. but you can start to show love and appreciation for yourself through self-care practices. after all, its a celebration of your humanness.
what is self-care?
self-care can be understood as a set of practices or rituals that you do on a regular basis to ground you. they are usually simple things that you can do to improve your mood & allow you to process your emotions. it is important to remember that self-care does not always come easy. we are conditioned to constantly be striving for more & this sometimes comes with neglecting ourselves. self-care is a skill that needs to be practiced and implemented in the long-term.
you deserve to be cared for!
there is a huge emphasis on being selfless & helping others. whilst this can be a rewarding experience, you may abandon yourself to meet someone else's needs. it is important to remember that showing love for others begins with loving yourself. it is your responsibility to treat yourself with compassion, kindness & respect. this more you care for yourself, the more capacity you'll have to care for others
self-care isn't selfish, its a priority
self-care is the ultimate testament to how much you honour your humanness. the way you treat yourself will determine how you show up for other people. try your best to make this a priority.
self-care strategies
there are so many ways that you can show care for yourself. different things will work for different people. whilst there are self-care strategies that involve other people, such as spending time with friends, it is useful to aware of activities that you can do by yourself. remember that self-care is a life-long practice, so don't worry if you don't find an activity that works for you straight away. self-care should make you feel grounded, relaxed and at peace with the world. these can be activities that allow you to express your thoughts and feelings. they are rituals that lower your stress levels. try your best to differentiate from things that you want to do from things that you think you should do. the self-care strategies that you use a highly personal. here are some suggestions:
exercise
meditation
spending time in nature
journaling
drawing/
painting/
sewing
listening to/
playing music
cooking/ baking
sleeping
balance and self-expression
even though some self-care strategies can put you into a flow state-where you are completely immersed in what you are doing-, they are not meant to act as distractions from your feelings & responsibilities. they are rather a buffer for more stressful situations. unfortunately, no one is able to go through life without experiencing hard times. this is why it is important to practice self-care regularly to create balance between positive and negative experiences. here's an example: after a long day at school, you decide to spend 2 hours some evenings painting as this grounds you. this acts as a distance between academic work but does not distract you from your priorities as you have set a time limit. some activities also go hand-to-hand with self-expression. for example, you may express anger by going to a long run or explore other feelings through journaling.
To find out more about self-care for the support circle, check out this resource on self-care for individuals subjected to sexual violence and abuse .
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